If you clicked here, you're trying desperately to avoid doing real work. Check out these amusing/entertaining/totally metal links in the meantime:

Link Numero Uno - My old rock band, The Crazy Ivans. Their shit is METAL!! And speaking of metal, check out the bad-ass thrash metal band Exmortus. There are probably hundreds, if not thousands, of bands named after books or literary characters... but as far as I know, this is the first time in history a book was named after a band.

Link Numero Dos - My longtime bud Keith has spent the last four thousand years designing this space conquest game, Star Bandits. It's almost ready to roll, and completely different from all the other Starcraft knockoffs out there right now.

Link Numero Tres - Easily the best-written, funniest site on the planet. Cracked is home to two of the best writers in internet history, Seanbaby and Chris Bucholz.

Link Numero Quatro - There's no easy way to scroll through this unfortunately, but here are the hundreds (thousands?) of hockey, movie, football and music articles I've written for TexasGigs/Pegasus News since I joined the Dark Side on Valentine's Day 2006. EDIT: as of Feb 2014, the DMN has seen fit to completely eliminate any trace of Pegasus News and its 1000s of articles. Which seems odd considering we were one of the bare shreds of actually-profitable pieces of that failing company, and that they had just spend six figures purchasing us, but I guess that's why I'm not in charge of a large corporation that's been hemorraging money for a decade straight. On the plus side, I saved a lot of those old articles on my hard drive, and plan on "re-purposing" some of the content in another one of my long-term projects.

Link Numero Cinco - You can also purchase a physical copy of EXMORTUS on Amazon's Createspace. I've priced it to be affordable for any non-hobo budget.

Coming At Some Point: A re-design of the site involving a large .jpg of Exmortus Abbey on fire, where you can click on various parts of the abbey to go to links, history, games, etc. Very ambitious, but I'm working on it and learning one pixel at a time. Also, in the distant future, a little PvP game where you can duel with the characters in EXMORTUS, as well as some other cool time-wasting stuff you can click around when your boss isn't watching.

aaaaaaaaaaaaiii